Resistance

In World War 2, resistance referred to the underground fighters who did everything they could to throw monkey wrenches into the Nazi war machine. Resistance was about putting up the best defense possible from tyranny and power of all kinds run amok. In psychology resistance refers to the defenses clients put up against therapeutic encroachment- don't try to change me! don't get inside my head! To change in general, resistance is the force that gets in the way...a vain attempt by the ego to control, to deny forces greater than us that have us in their grip.

I was up and out early enough this morning to catch the day young. The sun had barely put a dent into the night chill, giving off that wonderful, mystic feel of density and the slim divide between sleep and consciousness. The winds which have whipped themselves across the flats all winter are here still. When they are at your back, it feels like a motor attached to your rear end. When in your face, the effect is the same as hills. When you run in a place as flat as this, the winds are a boon- they give the same training as hills, and develop good strength and endurance.

I have an odd relationship with wind. When I first make the turn and find myself running into stiff resistance a part of me balks and whines like a little child; I resent those winds. I think, why now, why me wind? can't you just let me have my little run without all this tiresome work? I've been struggling at work with this notion of resistance as I make the turn from one moment, or day or week to the next and find the next absurd challenge- I whine, I sulk...I start to plot my revenge, or my strategy to reform, or yes, resist.

Resisting is fighting. There is the good fight, then there is the fight that spins our wheels pointlessly, against a bigger force than us. No matter how much I want to wish that wind away, I end up making friends with it, knowing that somewhere down the road my legs are going to get their leverage, and that the endurance that comes with running into the wind is worth the effort.

It's hard convincing my clients to work with that fight, and identify the benefits. All I get is the whiny, child-like complaints and bad attitude that comes with "why me, why this, why now?" What they don't realize is how smart those questions can be, if used right. The winds will find you if resistance is your game. The chilled air, the loveless night, the hard-scrabble work will haunt you if fight is the game, for fight's sake. But find the good fight. Find the good reason, to build strength, patience, stamina, resolve. Learning to utilize the forces for your favor is what it all amounts to. While the planet wobbles in its path, we will all be learning the same thing.

To my little buddha mom, whose birthday we'll soon be celebrating...who teaches me now what it's like to surrender, endure and 'dance' even when you can't move from the chair. xoxox