Slow Run: Moving is still movement

I have a saying about myself:  I am a high energy person in a low energy body.  Meaning,  all my life I have had enormous mental and spiritual energies...which often translated into wild and unpredictable emotional energy.....and generally leaves my body lagging behind in an attempt to keep up!  Running became my Grounding practice.  Good run or bad,  nice weather or not,  keeping a routine of getting out there consistently to move my body has helped me re-introduce myself to my body in a new way.   Where I used to think of bodies as "necessary", something to endure, put up with,  micro-manage (ok I still do that),  I began to feel it was my vehicle towards total integration.   Movement, meditation, free thinking...often crying or otherwise weird emotional expressions!....Running was truly the thing that put it all together.

So as I navigate the health system to determine what, if anything, is going on with said body,  I've ramped down the miles.   Yesterday,  my typical long run day,  I simply put my shoes on and headed out past the park with no expectations...walking, walking, finally finding a very slow- but steady- jog pace that I kept up meandering through Emerald Hills,  up towards Griffin,  and turning for the cut-down back to Park.  Maybe 5-6 miles?  And often feeling like I just couldn't quite hit that next gear- breaking to walk the last mile or so.  I felt a little lost and frustrated.  I wondered what was wrong and how to fix it.  I wanted back my Long Run Bliss....and kept that thread of thinking up until the orange bougainvillea practically grabbed me as I passed by:

 The light was streaming through the intense orange....and I 'felt' Mello (her color) reach over and grab me, saying something like "Rainbow Warrior,  wake up!! What gives?! Turn this thing around!  Change is in the air!!"  (Mello was never known for 'soft and warm'...more like spiritual drill sergeant!)

So I stopped right there.  I looked closer,  took pix...admired the light,  the array of spider webs, the intense color...I 'felt' her pressing upon me, connecting with me,  standing with me.  I felt supported by my Sun Temple brothers and sisters and dismissed the tapes of "not enough" as in "not good enough" and decided right then to stop punishing myself for perceived flaws and failures.   The body does what it needs to do,  and high time I support it whole-heartedly and take GOOD CARE of ME.

Thanksgiving is a time for looking at all that tumbles out of the vast Cornucopia of Life.  The generosity of living comes with its share of triumphs and challenges.  I will write more towards week's end about all the ways in which this year,  the holidays move us to turn ever deeper into our spiritual nature and reap the Bounty of Understanding...not just for everyone else in our lives,  but for our Selves as well!!