Seeing Clearly Now, the Rain is Gone

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=r1MjRp0ys5I

After our immersion in the deep waters of the last weeks,  sunshine returns to South Florida.  The sleeplessness finally gave way to a better night, and I woke to light streaming in the back door.  Without thinking,  I geared up and headed out towards the beach,  feeling the pull to see what La Mer was like in the aftermath of our deluge.   It was later than I should be out on a summer-like day;  the sun was augmented by the humid air, but a strong breeze was coming off the ocean, pushing the clouds around in bunches of greys and whites against a cerulean sky.  I felt foggy and tired after finally getting some deeper sleep, clearly on the other side of the energy swing and the job of integrating everything happening...

The rainstorms seem like a giant cleansing which gave way this week to some of the first crucial steps of a disclosure so deep, that I believe (as do others) it was the tipping point.   In counseling,  there are sometimes 'moments' when folks suddenly find themselves 'going there', to that 'event', that 'secret', that tragedy or trauma or 'sick thinking' no one knows about.  It is the tipping point.  It's when I know 'I'm in,' because disclosure has really begun, and now I must allow the roll-out and follow the trail with them,  to help them see it,  accept it, integrate it- heal it.

'Seeing' is an art.   My right brain skills are constantly tapped and stretched, and yet come so naturally to me, it often takes others pointing it out before I even notice.   From as early as I can remember, I 'saw' the world in a matrix of patterns and inherent design that came naturally;  even the discord of city/suburban Pittsburgh gave up it's beauty,  it's quirks and industrial compromises,  everything flowing into my eyes with a perfection...didn't everyone see this?!  Of course I explored art, and music and literature and writing...every which way humans have taken off into an expedition of this experience...and lived as an artist for many years...and of course I would ultimately be 'drawn' (good one),  into a more esoteric application in mediation and therapy:  oh yes, I 'see' you too!  When I am with someone,  I 'see' and sense patterns of integration, disintegration,  tangled threads of beliefs embedded into themselves with harsh emotional charges,  soft, delicate spools of hope like the tendrils on a vine, reaching out for the light of understanding.  I see 'where' they're going, as if I could unravel all those skeins of experience and follow them right into a person's essential Self.

And so I 'see' the World Gestalt in similar ways.   The 'design program' in me takes the said and unsaid,  the 'official version' of reality with the undercurrents I always have sensed- and learned over many years with many 'teachers-  and morphs it all together into my 'current take' on things.   So I 'knew' the moment the news broke on Friday (about government surveillance):  we reached the tipping point,  the disclosure process will now speed up, and JUST WAIT FOR WHAT HAPPENS NOW!!

All this was on my mind on the way up to the beach,  with a pace so slow once again a fast walker would easily pass me by,  but that was all the gas I had, as I came into North Park.

The winds has whipped up under the fast clouds, skimming through the sunlight.  La Mer never disappoints as I took my time absorbing the sea smells, the wide sky, and took a few pix, filling my water bottles for the way home. 

It was HOT!- oppressive as I started back across the intercoastal, nodding to the guys with their fishing buckets,  the runners with dogs, with babies in strollers,  the walkers who, yes, were just ahead and barely faster than I, dog tired and feeling the heat like a hot blanket on my head.  I thought about my new client who just started running a few years ago, and has already done marathons and an impressive list of races,  the colleague I met at training who 'jogs' with her dog (is jogging different than running?); I finally just walked several long stretches on the return and wondered at how we all maintain our momentum, our motivation, our courage in the face of the many elements which can 'seem' to work against us.

For me,  the Grand Design leaves nothing out, even the 'obstacles'.  If art is ultimately an editing process, we start with the blank slate/page/canvas/paper....we choose from an infinite variety of materials to create our piece of the Big Puzzle.  In therapy we start with a few limited 'items'/issues....because this is all that we can 'see'...until eventually we disclose more and more of ourselves in a true, authentic way.  We 'become' ourselves, but of course we were 'there' all along,  it was simply hidden from view.  It takes a determined runner to get out there in the heat, alone, tired...it takes an intrepid client to come back time after time to talk about the hidden stuff,  attached as it usually is to so much perceived pain.   It takes a formidable counselor to hang tough through it all, but for me it is like any run.  Always curious, I never know exactly what I'll be facing until I'm in it,  and once I am,  I 'plug into' that Grand Design and follow the trail, translating as I go what I hear, what I see so that client can see it too.

The Whole World is waking up to what has been hidden for zillions of years.  Whether it's what the government was doing last year, 50 years ago, or what civilizations existed outside written memory...or the interception by Space People who are getting ready for another grand exposure,  we need to stop blocking the flow of Truth, for Truth will win out every time.  It may seem like it takes forever to get to the core of it all.  But Nature knows Her stuff...She is set upon a course which will gather all of this up in Her Intrinsic Design, Her Grand Changes, and us with Her.   Trust your own truth.  Know you have a listener, a keeper, a guide.  Whoever it is who holds the key to YOUR awakening,  allow it to unfold. It may be the stars in the sky, or the warming sun.  Or you may be surprised to find that the one(s) who hurt you most, or seemed to block your way have been your best teachers all along.