Summer Running 2010

Up and out between 6:30 and 7 AM, the sun having just hit the roofs of the condo buildings, preparing to heat up the moist night air into a sweat bath, but not for a few miles yet, as I head up Park. It's been a tiring week; nothing at work is ever balanced; either too much chaos or a dull roaring calm before the next storm, I am ever on my guard against too much stimulus pushing me into frenzied compensation. None of which really relates to my clients who are always the best part of what I do! By Friday, the first one I hadn't taken off in a month, my reserves were down. Sleep is the only antidote to fatigue...so I was optimistic that today I could run on more rest.

I try not to compare what training this time last year was like to now. The Marine Corp marathon was creeping up on me all summer, and my mileage was also increasing from the 30's per week, to 40's until at my peak I had a few 50 miler weeks with the long long runs. It was the summer of beach loops with my training buddy on the bike, out for hours and hours in the brutal heat. It was strength training and yoga, and so much attention to diet. The anticipation on the one hand and the stress and grief over losing my Dad just prior, and the last class before completing licensure requirements. Everything piled on and I mastered it, suited up, finished up, and ... crashed.....

This year's summer running is the antithesis of last: no meters, watches, fuel/fluid belts, no gels, gu's or extra anything. No weekly mileage 'requirements', no strict dietary no-no's. The goal this year is, "just run!" whenever I can, however long I can, where ever I feel like it.

While my post-menopausal body continues its transmigration into elderhood, a process I am not the least on board with yet, my mind struggles to find its footing in the constraints of aging's demands. I remain convinced that if I made it my absolute priority, I could find a way to build back to a bigger, better base and STILL become the ultra-runner I have inside my head! And even so, the dream-sojourner in me also realizes that the long trekker who keeps moving me place to place is responsible for this inherent self-image; I am always, somewhere deep inside, on my way...

It's a lucky thing we evolved this universe inside of us. The medicine people know there is no need for bodies when it comes to travel. For me, I hope to hang on as long as possible to the alchemy of weaving into one the twin trails of inner and outer movement. For me, the power is amplified, the juice is on. I 'see' my way through any obstacle thrown my way.