After no long run last weekend, I split my usual Sunday run between yesterday and today. Heading back to John Lloyd today, a kind of 'do-over' from Saturday, improved weather and other emotional conditions aside, and a chance to once more this weekend run the out and back. And again, noticing that reducing miles and increasing calories has helped me on the road. Even if vanity disagrees, I really needed the break.
There were rose petals strewn towards the water's edge; something took place yesterday.....
....and fishing off both sides of the jetty in water that looked emerald, steely blue and turquoise all at once....
and happy families generally enjoying the beautiful day. As long as I ran I felt I could work out anything; the fatigue, uncertainty, anxiety, the persistent press of ticking time towards 'real world' problems and the ever-vexing pressures of work. I could even feel my way through the intricacies of emotional triggers as one by one I could click them off a list: money, sex, gender roles....power/control....how do we help ourselves and each other without taking away pride, dignity, self-respect. Every one is topsy-turvy. And yet, as always I found that sweet spot about 3 miles in, after the turn back, when my feet just felt like they had a mind of their own, picking up a tiny bounce and roll off the road that gave everything a lift.... my spirit finally peeking through the tallest perspective like the prows of the big cruise ships above the treeline. It's all rolling itself out like a long lonely road, too long alone until the whole pack of us, runners, bladers, bikers, walkers and lookers....and all the frolicking, foolish, gullible, mis-guided lot of us, stumble on down together. It never amazes me how wonderful it always is, whatever we find.
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